We have explored the possibility of projection in multiple blog posts (here, here and here) and considered the words of some very wise people (Carl Jung, Sigmund Freud, Jesus, Dalai Lama, Anais Nin, Byron Katie) on the subject. Now it’s time to discover what we can do about it.
We started our discussion by highlighting relationships which irritate us. Let’s go back to one of those relationships. What is it that is so irritating? Why do we feel so strongly about this particular person? Let’s be specific and make a list of all the things that bother us about this person or situation.
Now it’s time to remember the following:
Any strong emotion, positive or negative, we feel toward another is ALWAYS about US.
Others are simply mirrors reflecting back to us. Who and what appears in our life is a reflection of what is going on inside of us. When we feel STRONGLY about a situation or person, we can know it is about US. There are no exceptions.
So, here are the important questions to ask ourselves:
- In what way(s) are we like this person?
- What are we doing in our life that is like what we see in this situation?
It may take a while to answer these questions. We may even want to discuss the possibilities with someone we trust. But as soon as we can see the similarities, we can resolve the issue(s).
And that is how WE can control what goes on inside of US!
Very relevant to my office work lately. Thank you for the reminder.
You’re welcome! Once I finally began to understand this concept, it really saved me from a lot of angst.
Good quote! Thanks for sharing!